Why did King Arthur create a cadre of men to sit around a roundtable? (Yes, I know he wasn’t real and this is just a story based in some fact.)There were a myriad of reasons, all justifiable:
1. The knights were constantly fighting each other for territory so he wanted to bring them together to stop fighting
2. He used a roundtable so that no one knight would be appear to be more important than another and thus no fighting for the lead spot
3. The round table was big enough to hold all of the important people leaving no one out.
4. They could all see each other clearly and more importantly, watch each other carefully.
5. He clearly needed advice for running the kingdom.
6. He did not know the knights well and this was his chance to meet and work with them on a personal level.
Unfortunately, even though the idea was great, the plan failed, why?
1. When people get together, someone has to always be in charge; and it is not necessarily the one you selected to be in charge that reigns.
2. Even if the table is round, that doesn’t stop the development of a hierarchy.
3. Some people are smarter than others.
4. Some people never lose their need to be in charge even though they have nothing of value to say.
5. Some people argue over any issue they can find.
6. Some people have egos that cannot be suppressed for any reason no matter how altruistic.
7. It’s difficult to make people believe in listening to others when they are not used to it.
8. Sitting together does not make people respect others.
Although this concept did not produce the desired results, it did raise some important issues about government and the future of government (and friendship). There is a reason some people are inclined to be around others. There are reasons why some people end up in charge of the group.
What Arthur failed to do was to ensure that everyone felt important; everyone felt that they were being listened to and that everyone wanted to remain as a group regardless of the issue. A strong issue can bring people together but it is not the glue that holds people together. People need to feel wanted and that is the necessary grease that bonds us. Friendship or any other kind of human connection requires give and take; room for errors; opportunity for all to succeed and feel successful.
Although Arthur failed at his attempt to create a strong cadre of individuals for support, I have learned a lot from him in hindsight. I have no round table but I have a cadre of knights: my friends and my family. I rotate the responsibility for who is in charge (I no longer keep the mantle for me alone); I can lean as well as lead; I make sure each person knows how much they mean to me; and I keep a few chairs open for the new friends and colleagues that I make. Thanks Arthur, you made my choices easier.
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