Monday, May 23, 2011

Day 9: I was a shoe whore...

OK,  I admit it,  I was a shoe whore.  I couldn't get enough: heels, designer shoes (that were impossible to walk in but so incredibly cute), pairs and pairs and pairs.  I needed a closet just for my shoes and folks I lived in a condo in Brooklyn.  You can imagine how impossible that was. I knew I had a problem but I didn't care: shoes were my chocolate, my ice cream, my substitute for everything.

Then I met Joey, only he was a shoe whore (mimbo?) too.  We started hitting all of the places together feeding our shared addiction: DSW, Payless, Nordstroms.  Every place we could find, from the cheapest to the most expensive.  We clearly had a problem and we fed our need together...I know why people of similar adddicitons get together.  We'd walk down our respective aisles separately occasionally shooting each other a glance, a smile, especially when spied a deal.  It was nearly orgasmic.

That was then, now we are reformed shoe whores.  How did we quit?  Actually,  it was so gradual that I barely noticed.  First, we ran out of room, especially when we decided to move in together.  I noticed his obsession long before I admitted to my own (how typical).  If you think it is difficult finding places for your own shoe obsession when you live alone, how about when you move into an apartment together?  We bought those plastic cases for shoes under the bed; metal rows for inside the closet; metal rows for outside the closet.  We were under water with shoes every where.

Now please understand; Joe and I have larger feet than most people.  I am a confessed size 11.  Can you believe that I wear a size 11?  I think that is why I was always so thrilled to find great shoes  at my size.  OK,  I am rationalizing, I know it.  Anyway,  when I saw the volume of our collective shoe obsession, I knew we were in trouble.

I admitted it first, "Joe,  I am a shoe whore."  He agreed and I waited for his realization of his own issue and it came.  He's great about admitting the truth (one of his best qualities).

We never actually agreed out loud to stop anything but our shopping addiction waned as our love and respect for each other grew.  Togetherness at home replaced long shopping trips.  Space became a reality in our lives.  Boundries were developed.  Expenses shared and calcuated.

The result?  My American Express hasn't had a shoe  charge in at least a month (I did need new running shoes, come on I still need shoes once in a while) but I am happy to report that I have given away over 30 pairs of shoes to friends and relatives ( who are size 11) and I haven't felt the need to replace my once stellar collection.

The bottom line?  I think that love and acceptance of who I am has replaced my need for shoes.  As a former shoe whore to other shoe whores out there, love is cheaper and more fun....

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