Back in Brooklyn, I am noticing the usual amount of “reformed” potholes. Potholes are evidence of a harsh winter and NY definitely had a harsh winter even though I clearly missed most of it in Florida (yes, I’m bragging a bit, sorry). I feel like I have a few potholes myself as I sit in the gynecologist's office waiting for the dreaded Pap smear and bone density test. What we women have to endure.
It's not the act of the examination that I fear, or the results either for that matter (or maybe I should at my age), it's the waiting, the waiting, the waiting.
Whenever you come to NYC or any city for that matter, you need to have a depth of patience or you're going to be miserable. You must wait for everything whether or not you are on foot, in the car, in an office, wherever you go. The wait may be undeterminable or indefinable or simply happen suddenly with no warning. Most people are leveled by changes in their plans that involve inordinate amounts of time…this is called waiting.
It seems to the common person that doctors have the most control in their jobs. They have learned to pack their offices all at once so they don’t have to wait (or rest or eat for that matter). I always enjoyed the circus of my son’s orthodontist who had five chairs filled in one room so parents could see why waiting was necessary.
Conductors have the best job, no not on the train, conductors of orchestras because clearly everyone has to wait for them to begin the concert. But most of us have no control over our time even though we have such dandy technology advising us on the starting time of our arranged appointments.
Patience is clearly a virtue that I am learning about and which I need to acquire. It's a lot easier to develop patience if you are retired and not in a mad rush to accomplish “whatever” in 10 seconds or less so I feel it is time for me to venture into this forbidden zone of calmness.
We live in a society where people tap their foot in front of a microwave so why should we be surprised about the depth of distress or anger associated with waiting in any venue.
In my personal quest for happiness, I am examining many aspects of my kaleidoscopic stress levels and their causes. When my stress is lower, I eat less, sleep more (and better), and smile a lot more. So how do you control your stress and deepen your patience quotient?
Your patience quotient (my term), has everything to do with personal attitude. I have learned that really no one can upset me… except me. Let me explain.
I have learned that I ALWAYS have the choice as to how I react to something (or for that matter, not react to something or someone who ruffles my feathers). I am tired of explosive responses from me (and others) and it is time to build my patience quotient so that I can lead the way.
I am not suggesting that everyone has the current capacity to take on this noble task, but maybe more folks should. If we all just stepped back a moment and ….Well I just got my chance. A young pregnant woman came in to her appointment one hour late and they took her ahead of me anyway (is that ok the nurse says and glances steadily at this ripening young woman;. even though I have been waiting over an hour to get in.) Deep breaths, cleansing breaths, ok, let the pregnant woman go ahead of me; it’s only time, and I clearly have more time than she does. Breathe deep, look its working; I’m not mad; it’s only a matter of patience.
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