I know it is frustrating for some people but I do not read directions. I’d rather put the “thing” together, no matter what it is, rather than read about it first and follow the diagram. Why? I’m not sure but I have been told it relates to my learning style. The truth might be that I am too impatient to wait and read the directions…or it might be that all directions are written by people who do not teach and therefore know little to nothing about how to relate information to others and end of writing unintelligible information (this is why so much direction language has been replaced by pictures.) Either way, directions are frustrating and annoying to me and simply delay the project.
I like to put my hands into the project right away; I’m more of a cake maker not a bowl licker. I’m a “hands on” kind of person. It is for this reason that I tend to take over projects from others in my frustration that the project begins too slowly. This often has two negative results: I annoy some people by being too pushy and I frustrate others by leaping before I look, so-to-speak.
There is nothing wrong with my learning style of diving into the project (except for the annoying side affects to others of course), and there is nothing wrong with the planner types who read the directions and pantomime the project before starting either; we’re just different that’s all.
Some years ago, I read an article about these two learning styles in comparison. They gave the same projects to build small model boats to pairs of these types. The results: Each person finished the models in the same amount of time, give or take a few minutes, regardless of their styles.
Planner types are patient and careful people; they are pre-thinkers who spend time analyzing all the steps before they start. They feel this assures them of more success and it hits their comfort zone of being precise.
For me, this takes away some of the magic of putting things together; the challenge of determining what goes where and why; the putting together of the puzzle before me. What’s interesting is that planner types seem attracted to people like me (what do you call us…impetuous, rash, experiential types?) and vice versa. I have always believed that we seek the missing ingredients of who we are in others and that there is a natural seeking of these missing factors in looking for partners in our lives.
I have fallen in love only twice in my life and each time I chose a planner man so if you use me as the example, the survey says “yes” we choose others who possess the missing ingredients or complimentary factors of who we are when choosing a mate.
I like this idea for many reasons but mostly because becoming a couple with another person must have more reasons than initial attraction; you need a deeper connection, more than biological, more than physical. Unlike current thinking, I still believe in the complete relationship, defined as one in which you share a new personality together as a couple that you didn’t have as a single person. I like learning from my other side of the couple, Joe. I like emulating his skills and knowledge base. I like copying his thinking from time to time...
I will always be the exciting and impetuous individual that I am (although I have slowed a bit; cured with age if you will) but I love the strength of his anchoring personality that keeps me grounded and feeling safe. You cannot always have your feet off of the ground you know…
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